不过如此

当朝夕盼望的事终于出现在你面前

而那种感觉不是自己想像的

你是否会问自己到底过去一直执着的是什么

是一个人

是一种埋藏在心里的思念

你到底是被这种思念缠绕着

还是你自己根本不愿意放手

还想继续沉溺在这种感觉当中

用它来麻醉自己

一个人的价值观

有时侯会随着时间和环境改变

可能它今时今日的价值

已经比不上那时候的感觉

有些人要用一辈子的时间忘记自己的故事

有些选新的方向去发展

也有些人继续走原来的路线

轻易放算不算是没有原则

或是不肯放弃只是一个人太执着

怎样的情节

有多精彩

都要自己一步一步走出来

没到最后

结局是怎样

没有人会知道

(extract & edited from HK TVB drama - Season of Love 2013)

Another decision to make?

Nahhhhh!!! Off-Peak I am now!!!

Seriously I wanted to scream it out loud which I have promised myself whenever I felt breathless during the last few months. But it end up with "OMG Finally it is JULY 31,2012. I swear am going to be less efficient than usual from today onwards", in heart only!!! Not even have the energy to scream and just wanted to off and back home sharp at 5.30pm.

(p/s: I know is kinda late to post this right now, but just feel like to jot it down as one of my life event as an auditor?lol)

And OMG, the off-peak season is really a.w.e.s.o.m.e. lol. I was like in the holiday mode although assignments keep on coming, but am in the slow and easy mode doing the works(without any pressure/stress and try to take it easy). Not even bother to rush and they turned out good too. lol. I will keep it on then. There goes the-after-peak-picture of us! LOL 

There are pros and cons when it comes to having more spare time during the off-peak season. Got the time to rest, and when you have enough rest, you will think more than usual. Is good to let ourself to think and figure out what is the next step should be, but when it comes to the time that we need to make choice/decision, well honestly, I hate. Should I take the chance now or later? Not a good timing again???Urghhh. Am just lazy to pick choice and hate to make decision. Perhaps, am all alone in making decision for myself all these years and am really tired.

Okie, I know I still need to move on by myself no matter how much I hate. Just can't let myself to stand still right now at this stage! 

I believe in faith and I will fight for it next!

Will be wrapping up September 2012 real soon...again? lol

Anyway, time for counting down for the study break!

Random

Have been wanted to spend some times alone, listening to the rhythm of the songs and to jot down somethings at this space, a space which truly solely just for my own self to blab on. :D

I used to write or to have this blog 4 or 5 years back. Just spending my time here other than study or hanging out. A space which I can somehow express myself (not all perhaps), to release whatever anger or stress, etc. etc. And now, I know I miss those times, which I can simply have my time to feel and to write whenever I wanna to.

Works and outings with colleagues simply filled up my days, including my precious weekends. Of course, I did feel happy spending time after work with them. I use to spent my weekends doing my own stuffs. Staying at home alone, watch series, housework, or anything else which I feel I want to do can simply make my weekends. And these make me feel that I finally did something for myself other than works! LOL. I know is kinda lame, but this is just so me. I would love to stay in my own comfort zone once in a while (average of 2-3 weekends every month will be nice :P) rather than hanging out, that's just tiring. haha, sign of getting old? 

Is not the matter of I don't like to hang out or like to stay alone, but sometimes I just need a space just for myself, times which just for me, for no reason. I might be spending time doing nothing, just browsing through the net, or just cleaning up and decorating my place, or just hang out to the nearest bookstore for some readings, or a window shopping will do.

"I need some times for myself" are words that often come to my mind after been working for about 6 months. I need the times to cope with all the updates, for some extra readings, to figure out the way to brush up myself etc. etc. I don't want to spent my entire life just to work for the sake of the job. Just so scared whenever am asking myself is that my life all about. 

After all, am still alright. Just to blab :P I know I simply need a little bit more time to figure out myself. 

Space and time is all I need now! haha ;)

Here goes some updates on myself recently :)

Random outing's shot of us

Celebrated my 23rd birthday with surprise from colleagues during our working trip @ Kuantan.

Thanks for everything. Am blessed to have you guys working together.

Wrapping up everything :)

Another ordinary post to wrap up my 2011. :)

A very brief one.

Finally graduated and stepping into the working world. Everything seemed to be on track and I feel thankful for that.

Nothing much for this year. As usual, uncertainties and challenges keep on coming. Welcoming them with opened heart.

Losing granny in the month of October was indeed another changes in the year for my family. Although it was expected since she was suffering for illness, lying on the bed for almost a year, but somehow we still can't really use to it especially when we come across those times/memories with her when she was still doing good. May you rest in peace. 

Things may not come out as expected, which did turn me down to some extend, but it did turning me to a better one or even tougher one as well. I am learning to grow. Last but not least, thanks to those who bear with me, who giving me support and advice whenever I need, who willing to spent time with me just to make sure everything is ok on me etc. etc. You guys are truly awesome buddies!

Spending 2/3 of my new year holidays with besties! Had a great time with them together with nice food and desserts. =)

Have a great year ahead everyone!

Another Chapter =)

Here I come =P

Been staying at home for months since May after done with my studies in college, preparing for both internal & external resit's papers, and finally waiting for the results.

Everything seems to happen so fast when I recall back what I did for the past few months.

During the time, I used to get bored when having my revision at home and waiting for the results to be released. So, I make up my mind to find a temporarily job instead of my planning, which is to finish at least 4 remaining ACCA papers out of 6 before I get into the working life (thinking that I won't be using the 5 months break before the next exam's sitting to study full-time...lol) or maybe going for my degree's top-up program next year.

I went into job hunting conditions, prepare resume, apply various relevant types of jobs, waiting for calls, attending interviews, assessments and etc. For a fresh graduate with average results like me, the job hunting process was beyond words. Other than the basic requirements such as your academic results and also some soft skills, the first impression and talk confidently is a must during the face-to-face interview. And don't ever under-estimate yourself, send in your resume/profile to any position that you feel comfortable with, although you may think that they won't hire you because of your results but you may get surprises from that. You might not be shortlisted, but you will learn and get something during the entire process which will definitely useful.

I got a job and today is my 1st day of work. Perhaps another brand new chapter. Although it might not be my dreamed job, but somehow I know I will gain something else, and I will be there again.

Hope it will be another simply blast brand new chapter!

Till then, good nite ppl =)

Officially Missing You - JS - Tamia (cover)

Lovely & Blessed =)

A Quick Ones ;)

Finally, I can officially start my holidays =D

Finished the 4 alphabets killer papers and the last outstanding paper on Monday.

Back in KL, the place where I stayed for almost 4 years for the last outstanding paper for 3 days.

After leaving there for 2 months back at home, kinda miss the life on myself back there. lol.

Am not missing the hectic, polluted environment there of course, but the shopping complexes :P

Whats next?

I really have no idea.

Perhaps, I should wait for the results 1st.

Praying real hard.

Will be staying back at home for the time being.

Yayy, my real home :)

I probably need some rest and vacation :)

心，还是痛了

但

泪，好像累了

:)

Oh YES!!!

12/05/2011
is the day for the results to be released

SCREAMMMM
in my heart early in the morning!!!

Perhaps, it was not early in the morning, already 10 something in the morning that time. lol.

I purposely stayed up late the night before, to wake up late the next morning. The results only to be released after 10am, and I bet the website will be packed and jammed, by the students to check for the results. It was torturing to keep on refresh and wait for the results. lol.

It was SCARED to death man!

I bet it will be even worst for those who are going for the degree top-up program soon in UK this coming June.

Am not going, but still am nervous. lol. It seemed like very long ago since I can get straight PASS for all subjects in the main sitting. I guess since last two exam's sittings, in the final year. WTH

Once you were downed for once, it can initially beat your confidence down to the max! It was really HOLY SHIT! This happened on me. It was really hard for me to get up, the process was so sucksssss.

Okay, I know everything gonna be over soon!!!


1 more to go for me to graduate officially as an Advanced Diploma student!


The results released seems to be the encouragement for me to move on, or else, my final year's life should be very dull I guess. lol. It was not a distinction results, but, at least, I make it as the promise to myself. ONCE FOR ALL!

Again
ONCE FOR ALL for the rests!!!

L.O.V.E

OMG! They are just soooo lovely!

This immediately comes to my mind once I finished reading one of the blog post couple minutes ago, half way doing revision. lol

I can see how lovely they are through the ways they interacted, although it may seems to be a bit weird through the eyes of others. But these are just the way they are.

I love to see lovely couple, the interactions, the ways they communicate, the ways they love and care, either with actions or just coming from the sake of how they love each other, naturally and not because of the "responsibility" as a couple, like willing to do anything, of course which is sensible, without any condition even though things they did might not work in the way that you expected to be. This flows naturally when there comes some one who is worth for us to do so. I guess should classified it as tolerance or perhaps forgiveness for all the time.

I love to see lovely couples, of course especially friends around me. To me, a relationship is indeed a precious gift for a lovely couple, when both them finally found the one that really appreciated them deep in heart, who is the one that will bear with each other etc etc. and thats the one that you think you are willing to spend with for the rest of your life.

Crap, eventually I don't know what am I trying to say here. lol. Seems like desperate for love. LOL. Sometimes I do feel jealous to those love birds, which I don't have =(. lol. But I truly feel happy for them when I can sense the happiness, which I think it is not easy for others to feel the joys of love that happened between them. It is not easy to make others jealous and sense the joys without any involvement in the process. You guys just did a great job to make me feel jealous, BUT I LOVE TO! lol. Get me? =)

Stay sweet for all the lovers out there!

"please make me feel more and more jealousy.lol"

xoxo

When the heart speaks

Preparing for final, the very last main exam sitting in my college life. What I can say is, I have no more feeling on them. Will just try to do the best on my part.

Whenever it comes to exam period, I started to get emo easily. Heart gets to speak even louder than usual, asking for everything that I have dream and think of, but not get to make it yet. When the heart tends to speak, means they are really meant to me. And for the last few sittings, I failed to fight with my heart at that moments. Took the wrong steps, made wrong decisions, and then comes the regrets.

Am a person who gets impatient easily, wants to settle things/problems ASAP. I don't like the "hanging" feels, like no end, and the the consequences is that I can't make accurate decisions at the same time when one don't have a peace mind and just follows the heart. Perhaps, I should have calm down myself before making any decisions.

Same for this time, but I guess I have been more strong to fight with my heart. Hope it continues to work by then.

"The tough thing about following your heart is what people forget to mention,

that sometimes your heart takes you places you shouldn’t be,

places that are as scary as they are exciting and as dangerous as they are alluring,

and sometimes your heart takes you to places that can never lead to a happy ending.

And that’s not even the difficult part.

The difficult part is when you follow your heart,

you leave normal, and you go into the unknown.

And once you do, you can never go back."

* From words and lyrics *

Just so true.

A beautiful day.

It was just simply beautiful.

I wonder but still I love

Good Night ppl !=)

Warmed =)

Been busy with assignments & presentations recently, which totally make life miserable.

They make me 早出晚归 almost everyday.

But am blessed to have awesome teammates that contributing lots of their ideas and hard works. I feel guilty, for not contributing that much due to my limited intelligence . LOL

We are left with 1 report to be submitted real soon next week and the presentation for the following week. Feel a bit relief, at least we came out with the outline and some clues.

Another thing which truly makes me feel warm after all, was the gatherings/outings with friends despite of all the stress-up life and also the work loads. Met up with friends from hometown and also those came back from overseas, coming down to KL for a short trip. We meet, we chat,we eat, we shop together like nobody's business. Feel like giving up on the 1st night gathering, when am just done with part of the assignment with the other teammates, at the late afternoon, and also the raining weather. Am exhausted, I guess also caused by the "monthly thingy". lol. But still, my heart wanted me to go.lol. xD . LUCKILY, I make it!

1st Night @ Gardens TGI Friday's

Feel warm*ed when filled by all those sounds of laughters, jokes, etc.etc. Stress-free condition. lol. Although am not really into the conversations with them, due to my tiredness, but I love updating myself on them through their conversations. ;)

2nd night @ Pavilion Sushi Tei

*Photo credit: Nicholas

Meanwhile, it was also the day which Japan was hit by the heavy earthquake and also tsunami. At 1st, I feel relief as I know that friend who studying there were back for holidays, and was praying hard for those struggling there. But when I was told that M'sia is one of the alerted country by my friend, out of the blue, I feel scared :S. Lame right. I even thinking whether should I stay at home instead of going out for the gathering. =.='''

May god bless.

所期待的时候就快到来了

可是心却好像冷了

Hulala

I have no idea with the lame title above. lol. It just 1st come to my mind when am thinking about the title =D

Feel like writing something at this hour, being alone occupying the living room, feel like exactly the World of MINE. lol. Simply like being alone quietly, especially during the night time, whether or not am doing anything.

The saddest time for me is over, whatever it is, it is. And I know am blessed on the other ways. It was like “苦中一点甜” =)

Thanks to those who spent time with me during that time, it is simply lovely to have you guys around.

Once for all, from now on! God Bless =)

越听越有意思

去寻找梦想的地方

掩饰着所有的不安

这段路有很多急转弯

手握着手说不要慌张

所有的事别往心里转

走出黑暗面对着变化

烦事只要换另一个角度去看待

那就会好了

Time to clean my dust. xD

Was planning to close down this blog as am not updating, and yea, perhaps my life is not that happening. LOL

But as I went through some of the previous posts right from the beginning when I started to blog, they did make me recalled back those days memories which formed part of my life. Some of these memories make me feel awesome and some of them did make me feel grateful.

Am thankful that I have been given those memories whether good or bad, happy or sad etc.etc.. For those bad, which I considered them as challenges that came towards me, although you had make me down, sad, stress like hell (or even crying during shower time instead of in the middle of the night.. lol) on that time, am still thankful that am given the strength to went through and get through it, and also together with all the supports, encouragements and loves that given to me from all of my loves. Loves that definitely covered my tears more than enough <3 .

So, I decided to keep my blog, helping me to jot down those "happening" matters throughout my life, but probably with no frequent updates. =)

Still having a few pending posts to wrap up my 2010 not yet up. LOL.

2 assignments and 2 presentations coming up next before I can get off for CNY. zZzzz

Last but not least

Am MISSING YOU guys so much

you know who you are. LOL

tough am not kind of person or friend that who will call or even text you guys so often, but there is no doubt that am still with you guys and truly hope that you guys are doing very well out there. =)

xoxo

Have a nice weekends ;)

*the most recent me*

in case you miss me...LOL

sleepy face again

For the year 2010

Started to have this post last year, and it will be my annual post(if I still maintaining this blog.LOL). Somehow, I feel that this is a way for me to recall back what had happened throughout the year and jot it down as part of my memories itself and also as the reminder to myself for those which truly made me to grow.

2010 was not a year for me, perhaps. I know it wasn't right for me to have this negative thoughts, but just accept it, take it and let it go along with 2010.

Most of us here have marked our so called legal age this year. Representing that we are adult and having the responsibility not only to our own self, perhaps to the family too. But for our generation, I bet there is no commitment for us until we graduated from college or university, which is a grant that may grant us for a living, given by our parents. Perhaps, is also a way for parents to ensure their children are capable enough to earn for a living in the future. Till then, only the commitment come to us. As time goes, some of us here is on the way to finish their studies or in the final year, and some are still enjoying the study life.

I used to have expectation that I will finish my studies, graduate on time, get a good job, settle down myself and so on. I have the confidence that I will make it, and I never doubt about that before. I never doubt about how will my life be after I graduate, but not for now, I feel blur when I was thinking about it. This started since I failed 1 subject in my final year that made me didn't manage to fulfill the requirement to top-up my Advanced Diploma to a Degree on time. I tried to convince myself that I still have a choice, which is ACCA. But somehow it was really hard as I went through on the past sitting on early this month. To be frank, I have no confidence. What would be my life after getting Advanced Diploma with average results?

I know, instead of thinking this and that, I should put more and more effort on my study. =) Perhaps, there will be a way for me to get through all these. =)

Am thankful that there is no single pressure from my parents nor family. They are giving full support to me throughout the journey. Sometimes, I feel sorry, even guilty to them as I think didn't play my role or my part good enough especially on my study. Sorry for that, and I will definitely make it soon!

Apart from my studies, I do hope my family is being blessed by God, especially to my grandma by giving her strength, to fight with her illness and suffers.

Till then, I think thats all for the year 2010 that truly made me grow, learn and change during the year =)

Merry Christmas ^.^

Merry Christmas ! =)))))

Am here to clean the dust. LOL

Hang out with classmates for steamboat session somewhere @ Sri Petaling on the Xmas Eve =)

I was told that prior reservation is needed as it was quite crowded.

We stuck in the traffic jam almost 1 hour ++ to reach there :S

Harbour Steamboat Restaurant

Instead of Tomyam or 清汤

Different and special 汤底 @ Harbour Steamboat

Can't really remember the name but the types of soup served is something that

清热润肺

For those who likes dumplings like me, you will love them very much. LOL

They serve various types of dumplings, with different meat, seafood & vege inside.

Taste AWESOME !

My very 1st try on lamb with soup. LOL

At 1st, I just wanna to have a try, as I don't really like to have it.

It was served in slice and it was NICE!

p/s: my classmates purposely come for this. LOL

There goes my Xmas Eve :)

Was not really into celebrating on this day actually, but after all and at least am not alone. LOL

As Xmas goes, New Year is coming.

Somehow, am not ready yet. :S

Till then, Merry Xmas to all of you =)

I'll Move On - Olivia

This road that I'm taking twists and turns
My life my chance turning dreams into reality
Down this path faced with so many things
Sometimes I feel like giving up and turn away

Can't seem to go on
And I've been through this before
Now where am I?
Where do I stand?
A little lost here

But I'll remember
All those times you've bought me through
I'd be a fool to give up cause the goal is near

I'll move on I'll go on
Lord I will take your hand
And you will guide me along
Survive through this storm

So I say, come what may
I'll hold on to my hope.
Yes, I will walk down this road.
And my passion drive will lead me on

Here I am once again caught in the rain.
Looking back I've come so far and I want to carry on

Take a step at time
It's alright
Even through this rain, I want to smile again

Don't hold back now
And I've been through this before
Now where am I?
Where do I stand?
A little lost here.

But I'll remember
All those times you've bought me through
I can feel the sun shining down on me

Here I am, Here I am
Lord I will take your hand
And you will guide me along
Survive through this storm

So I say, come what may
I'll hold on to my hope
Yes, I will walk down this road
And my passion drive will lead me on.